It Snowed In Louisiana!!!!!

Ugg Boot

I saw the strangest thing in Louisiana last night, snow. I haven't seen it snow here in many years. Of course the ground wasn't cool enough for it to stick, but it's still on cars and on top of tall grass. This is the closest thing to a white Christmas I've ever seen. I wish it would stick. It would be sooooooooo much fun. And to everyone..... MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

Firefighters burn down their own sauna. Looks like someone needs training.

A cousin of Britain's Queen Elizabeth was banned from driving for six months on Thursday after he was convicted of speeding. Oh dear!

Police are looking for two women they say sexually assaulted a man with a pair of cooking tongs in a drug-related attack.

A MUM of four was killed by a rare allergy to tomatoes after opening a tin of spaghetti bolognese for her children's tea.

Did you know that a goat is a popular gift for Britons? That's Ba a a a a a ad. And so was that joke.

A father was charged with burglary and grand theft after he took presents from underneath a day care's Christmas tree. This is lower than low.

Why do people like to abuse Santa?
French teenagers mug Santa Claus.

Teen accused of Shooting Santa with a pellet gun.

This week in music history:

1918, German composer Franz Gruber pens the music for "Silent Night" ... the words have been written by Josef Mohr ... it is performed for the first time the next day--Christmas day--at Oberndorf, Austria, in the Church of St. Nikolaus...

1906, the first radio broadcast of a music program is carried out by Reginald Fessenden...

1954, musical boy-wonder Johnny Ace offs himself ... Ace is backstage at a Houston concert playing Russian roulette ... he first points and clicks the gun harmlessly at two others backstage ... but when he points it at his own head the folly of this pastime is brought home instantly and irrevocably...

1956, Elvis shines as the most successful chart star of the year, with 17 hits ... poor Pat Boone--the runner up--has had a mere five Billboard-charting hits...

1959, an 18-year-old Richard Starkey gets his first drum kit as a Christmas present ... the kit will take him far...

1959, Chuck Berry is arrested for transporting a minor across state lines for an immoral purpose ... he has invited a young Native American woman he met in El Paso to come work as a hat check girl in his Club Bandstand in Missouri ... the young woman is fired two weeks later and hustles a few days at a local hotel before calling police for help getting back home ... the call leads to Berry's trial, the guilty verdict of which is overturned because the judge made racist remarks...

1964, showing a distinct lack of Christmas spirit, a hoard of George Harrison girl fans whup up on Patti Boyd, George's girlfriend, for having what they all want...

1965, Rubber Soul goes gold after just two weeks on sale...

1967, the Beatles' Magical Mystery Tour, which Tom Wolfe will later claim is inspired by the travels of Ken Kesey and the Merry Pranksters, premieres on BBC-TV ... it creates plenty of mystery in its own right when audiences try to figure out what the Liverpudlian novice filmmakers could possibly have been thinking...

1968, Led Zeppelin gives its U.S. debut performance in Boston...

1968, the Miami Pop Festival features performances by Procol Harum, Chuck Berry, Fleetwood Mac, and Canned Heat...

1969, Elton John and Bernie Taupin join up to form one of the most successful songwriting teams of the 20th century...

1970, Joni Mitchell strikes gold for the first time with her album Ladies of the Canyon...

1970, George Harrison hits the post-Beatles' chart with All Things Must Pass...

1972, local residents raise hell about all the noise coming from a Manfred Mann concert in Miami ... authorities pull the plug mid concert and the crowd goes berserk ... destruction results...

1973, just two weeks before his band's release of What Were Once Vices Are Now Habits, Tom Johnson of the Doobie Brothers goes down for reefer possession...

1974, James Taylor, Carly Simon, Linda Ronstadt, and Joni Mitchell take to the streets of Los Angeles singing Christmas carols...

1975, Ike and Tina Turner are robbed of a suitcase filled with concert receipts ... the amount lost is $86,000...

1975, a whacked-out fan levels a loaded .44 at super-hunter Ted Nugent, but is brought down without incident by a combined force of security guards and fans...

1976, proving that they scored big when they got Joe Walsh on board, the Eagles touch platinum with Hotel California...

1977, Cat Stevens becomes a Muslim and changes his name to Yusef Islam...

1978, Rod Stewart releases "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy?" ... apparently someone does because the song will hit No. 1...

1978, The Who's drummer slot, recently and tragically vacated by Keith Moon, is amply filled by Kenny Jones...

1989, a former cook in the restaurant owned by Chuck Berry takes her erstwhile boss to court for allegedly placing a camera in the ladies' room...

1991, Greg Alman debuts his acting chops as a drug lord in the movie Rush...

1992, Harry Connick Jr. is busted at Kennedy Airport trying to smuggle a 9mm pistol onto a plane...

Christmas Is Almost Here!!!!

Ugg Boot

A 145-year-old German maker of toy trains is giving its adult customers a chance to have a one-track mind. The miniature train company Marklin is packing a condom alongside a blue freight car emblazoned with the name of Blausiegel, a German condom maker.

"Charging Bull," one of New York's most recognized statues that once made a brief debut outside the Stock Exchange, is for sale. The minimum bid is $5 million but sculptor and owner Arturo Di Modica says the buyer must keep the pavement-pawing statue where it now stands in the financial district and donate it to the city. So you buy this crappy thing for $5 million and can't even move it? Bullshit!!!!

State legislators banned the sale of shoe glue in Rio de Janeiro because too many people were sniffing it in the crime-ridden Brazilian city.

An unexplained phenomenon akin to a space-borne car wash has boosted the performance of one of the two U.S. rovers probing the surface of Mars, New Scientist magazine said Tuesday. It said something -- or someone -- had regularly cleaned layers of dust from the solar panels of the Mars Opportunity vehicle while it was closed down during the Martian night. Creepy!!!

Brotherly love was put to the test this week after two 18-year-old identical twins swapped their clothing and traded places so that one could escape jail.

What started as two and half minutes of indiscretion by two teenage schoolchildren has turned in a major scandal which has cracked India's conservative facade and raised serious questions about parenting and sex education. When a 16-year-old Delhi schoolboy used his phone camera to film his girlfriend performing oral sex on him, he could scarcely have imagined it would not only lead to his arrest but would also provoke intense national and international debate. My man!!! Keep that camera rollin!!!!!!

A teenager is suing her school district for barring her from the prom last spring because she was wearing a dress styled as a large Confederate battle flag. So much for freedom.

An arrest warrant was issued in Dallas Wednesday for the Motley Crue singer Vince Neil. He's wanted on a misdemeanor assault charge for allegedly beating down a soundman during an Oct. 30 gig in the Big D.

Today in History:
1775 - The United States Navy is formed

1849 - The execution of Fyodor Dostoevsky is canceled at the last second

2001 - Richard Reid attempts to destroy a passenger airliner by igniting explosives hidden in his shoes.

Birthdays:
1912 - Lady Bird Johnson, First Lady of the United States

1949 - Robin Gibb, musician (The Bee Gees)

1949 - Maurice Gibb, musician (The Bee Gees) (d. 2003)

2001 - Cc the cat, first cloned pet

My Christmas Party

My Christmas party this year was really nice,
We had the tree all covered with lights,


Everyone was festive and filled with cheer,
It's almost time for the party to get into gear,

We await our guests in our matching hats,

we even have a hat for the cat,

We had a lot of food for our big feast,

a lot of drinks too 25 kinds atleast,

Bubba and me have had a few too many,

Looks like Evan hasn't had any,

We eat and eat and eat and eat,
until our shoes won't stay on our feet,

What should I drink? the one on the left or right?
I'll drink them both just for spite,

Paul keeps trying to empty his glass,
everyone hopes he doesn't have gas,

Try this, he says with a laugh,
but she only drank half,

Buff and Paul wait on the couch,
to see what Santa has in his pouch,

We all exchange presents and look really dumb,
just a minute before I was sucking my thumb,

Paul's feeling good though you can't tell,
He looks like he's about to enter hell,

Michelle and Amy feeling real good,
the drank more than I could have stood.

Stupid Redneck Hunters!!!

Ugg Boot

As I was driving to work this morning in the blistering cold, I saw something that enraged me. I see this 4 wheel drive hunters dream of a pickup truck. I think every major part of the vehicle was a different color. In the bed of the truck is a 4 wheeler with something strapped to it. What is it? It's a cage but what's in it? 3 or 4 dogs. This cage was made out of some kind of mesh wire with no wind protection at all and the driver was going like 60 miles an hour making the already 30 degree temperature even colder. Keep in mind that this stupid redneck hunter was sitting in the warmth of his truck with several layers of clothes on to keep him warm. I thought how funny it would be to strip him down and put him in that cage and go for a drive. I have nothing at all against hunting. I do have a problem with people that mistreat animals. You should be shot!!!

A nanny left a year-old toddler home alone while she went Christmas shopping in the family Mercedes, not expecting the little girl's mother to pop into the house while she was out. See you in the unemployment line.

An 82-year-old Chinese Nobel physicist has popped the question to a 28-year-old student whom he described as his last gift from God. So why would a 28 year old female marry an 82 year old man? 1. Money (most likely reason) 2. Status/prominent family (second most likely reason) 3. Love (give me a break)

A man who visited a middle school dressed as Santa Claus on Thursday left with a citation for misdemeanor marijuana possession. IDIOT!!!!! Where were the elves on this one?? dipshit.

A worker at Buckingham Palace has been sacked for trying to sell a Christmas pudding gift from the Queen on an Internet auction site. You just don't mess with Her Royal Highness.

An armed robbery suspect used the arrest of his partner as a diversion to steal a new patrol car, crash into a ditch, break into a woman's home and then fall asleep on her couch. Dumbass!!!!!

Colombian police seized 292 voodoo dolls but were reluctant to inspect the black, hand-sized talismans for fear of witchcraft. Do you believe in witchcraft? I didn't ask if you practice, do you believe? If you believe in good spirits, you must believe in bad.

A gang of criminals armed with assault rifles and grenades raided the Fire Brigade Hospital in Rio to steal an automated teller machine containing $10,000. And I say, Damn.

A Peruvian rebel leader told a court on Thursday he was suffering mental problems because of 12 years of no sex and tough jail conditions. Wow! What could I say here? Masterbation anyone?

New Jersey casino regulators have fined Caesars Atlantic City $80,000 for using surveillance cameras to spy on women wearing revealing clothing. Ok ok ok ok. What red blooded man with the power to read the writing on a dollar bill with the security cameras, not use them to check out women? Wake up.

Impresario Robert F.X. Sillerman said on Thursday he agreed to buy 85 percent of Elvis Presley's estate, including rights to the singer's name and the management of his famed Graceland mansion, in a deal worth $100 million. C'mon Lisa, do you need the money that bad? Lisa should be spanked really hard. I'll do it. Call me Lisa.

9 DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS DAY!!!!!

Ugg Boot

I've gotta hurry, hurry, hurry,
it's almost Christmas and everything's blurry,
why is everything blurry you might ask,
maybe it was what came out of my flask,
maybe it was the alcohol I had to drink,
surely not, most of it came back up in the sink,
maybe it's my laziness by a warm fire,
that takes me even higher,
maybe it's the Christmas music that fills the air,
that takes away my every care,
the Christmas lights light up the night,
oh what a beautiful sight,
just one wish? snow on the ground
quick make snowballs all good and round,
at 10 on the dot we start the snowball fight,
where's Jereme? He's nowhere in sight,
I scan the snowy fields where can he be?
I hear something coming up behind me,
I turn to see a snowball hit me in the face,
with such force it knocked me into space,
for a second there was not a sound,
that is until I hit the ground,
I lay on the ground playing dead,
not moving a muscle, "are you alright?" he said,
the snowball in my right hand met his head,
I jumped up and away I sped,
laughing all the way, I ran and ran and ran,
look who's coming, it's Tommy and Stan,
strolling up the way they don't see,
someone is plotting a snowball spree,
Jereme and I wait to attack,
we have about 30 snowballs in a our stack,
at that instant Jereme let out a yell,
snowballs from every direction fell,
onto the helpless victims of our snowball fight,
we pound each other until it's almost night,
what am I doing? Daydreaming again,
I gotta hurry put down the Gin,
I'm deep in panic, I must say,
It's only 9 days until Christmas Day!!!

A Mexican man killed his lover in a drunken, drugged fight then cooked the man's body in tomato and onion sauce and ate it over three days.

The family of a man who died in a car crash a few years after stealing the bell of an Orthodox church in southern Albania has returned the bell saying the theft doomed the robber.

A routine traffic stop turned into a drug bust when Oklahoma Highway Patrol troopers found 610 pounds of marijuana stashed in four coffins.

Security screeners at Newark Liberty International Airport lost a bag containing fake explosives used to test the airport's bomb-detection system.

A former volunteer firefighter is facing charges that he made a series of false 911 calls so he could watch fire engines race toward fabricated emergencies.

A truck carrying 12 million honeybees hit a wall on a highway ramp, dumping its load across the pavement shortly before the evening rush hour.

This week in music history:

1944, a plane carrying bandleader Glenn Miller vanishes over the English Channel ... the fate of the aircraft and its passengers remains a mystery...

1955, Carl Perkins writes "Blue Suede Shoes" and records the song less than 48 hours later ... Elvis covers the tune later that year...

1957, Elvis gets his draft notice...

1960, German authorities deport 17-year-old George Harrison as he's too young to perform with the Beatles in the raucous Hamburg nightclubs that hosted the band in its early days ... Elvis Presley is inducted into the Los Angeles Indian Tribal Council ... the ceremony coincides with the opening of his movie Flaming Star in which the rocker plays a half-breed...

1961, EMI passes on the Beatles ... the British label has second thoughts later on and signs the lads from Liverpool...

1967, The Beach Boys are given transcendental meditation instruction by the guru to the Beatles, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi...

1969, The Supremes log their final appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show ... the trio sings "Someday We'll Be Together" as their TV swan song...

1977, The Sex Pistols are denied U.S. visas two days before the band is to appear on Saturday Night Live...

1988, James Brown draws a prison sentence of six years for fleeing cops during an interstate car chase ... he is paroled in February 1991...

1996, crooner Tony Bennett has just arrived at the White House for a holiday dinner with the Clintons when he suffers an erupted hernia and is rushed to a hospital where he undergoes emergency surgery...

1997, activists including Gloria Steinem and Eleanor Smeal protest in front of the Time Warner building in New York ... they are objecting to the Prodigy song, "Smack My Bitch Up"...

1998, a court finds that songwriter Andrew Lloyd Webber did not plagiarize a liturgical writer's song in composing the theme for his smash musical The Phantom of the Opera...

1998, two of Charlie Daniels' backup players demonstrate extraordinary work ethics when they schedule surgeries to coincide with their boss's appointment for knee surgery ... all three go under the knife on the same day in the same hospital in order to minimize show cancellations ... bassist Jerry Charlie Hayward has a tonsillectomy while drummer Jack Gavin has shoulder surgery...

1999, in announcing that he'll run for mayor of London, former Sex Pistols manager Malcolm McLaren enumerates the novel planks of his political platform: legalize boozing in public libraries, legalize pot, legalize all-night pubs, and last but not least, install brothels outside the houses of Parliament ... he drops out of the race a couple of months later...

1999, former singing cowboy Rex Allen is killed when his caregiver accidentally runs him over in the driveway of his Tucson home...

1999, Goo Goo Dolls nearly bite the big one when the military transport they're flying in skids off a runway in Sicily damaging its landing gear and wing, obliging the Goo Goos to beat a hasty retreat via an emergency chute...

2000, the British music journal Melody Maker prints its final issue after continuous publication since 1926...

2003, Michael Jackson is charged with seven counts of child molestation and two counts of supplying a child with "an intoxicating agent" ... his lawyer denounces the charges claiming they were motivated by money and revenge...

and that was the week that was.

---

Arrivals

December 15: guitarist Oscar Moore of the Nat "King" Cole Trio (1912), DJ Alan Freed (1922), country singer-songwriter Ernie Ashworth (1928), Cindy Birdsong of The Supremes (1939), Dave Clark of the Dave Clark 5 (1942), Carmen Appice of Vanilla Fudge (1946), Paul Simonon of The Clash (1955)

December 16: Ludwig van Beethoven (1770), Tony Hicks of The Hollies (1943), John Abercrombie (1944), Benny Andersson of ABBA (1946), ZZ Top's Billy Gibbons (1950), guitarist Robben Ford (1951), Christopher Thorn of Blind Melon (1968), Michael McCary of Boyz II Men (1971)

December 17: Boston Pops conductor Arthur Fiedler (1894), Tommy Steele (1936), Art Neville (1938), Eddie Kendricks of The Temptations (1939), Paul Butterfield (1942), Bad Company's Paul Rodgers (1949), Carlton Barrett of The Wailers (1950), Mike Mills of R.E.M. (1956), Bob Stinson of The Replacements (1959), Sarah Dallin of Bananarama (1961), Craig "DJ Homicide" Bullock of Sugar Ray (1972)

December 18: bandleader Fletcher Henderson (1897), Hendrix manager Chas Chandler (1938), Keith Richards (1943), Elliot Easton of The Cars (1953), DMX (1970), DJ Lethal of Limp Bizkit (1972), Christina Aguilera (1980)

December 19: Edith Piaf (1915), Professor Longhair AKA Henry Roeland (Roy) Byrd (1918), activist/folky Phil Ochs (1940), Earth, Wind & Fire's Maurice White (1941), Alvin Lee (1944), The Lovin' Spoonful's Zal Yanofsky (1944), John McEuen of The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band (1945), Doug Johnson of Loverboy (1957), Kajagoogoo's Limahl (1958), Kevin Shepard of Zoo Story (1968)

December 20: Blood, Sweat and Tears' Bobby Colomby (1944), Peter Criss of Kiss (1947), The Easybeats' Stevie Wright (1948), Billy Bragg (1957), Chris Robinson of the Black Crowes (1966), JoJo (1990)

December 21: Frank Zappa (1940), Albert Lee (1943), Beach Boy Carl Wilson (1946), The Rumour's Martin Belmont (1948), cleanup woman Betty Wright (1953), Gabriel Glaser of Luscious Jackson (1965), Brett Scallions of Fuel (1971)

Departures

December 15: Glenn Miller (1944), Fats Waller (1943)

December 16: country singer Gary Stewart (2003), Stuart Adamson of Big Country (2001), Nicolette Larson (1997)

December 17: soul singer Rufus Thomas (2001), opera diva Martha Moedl (2001), rock singer Bianca Halstead (2001), saxophonist Grover Washington Jr. (1999), producer Andy Wiswell (1999), singing cowboy Rex Allen Sr. (1999), Irish singer Ruby Murray (1996), Theodore "Hound Dog" Taylor (1975)

December 18: English singer-songwriter Clifford T. Ward (2001), singer Kirsty MacColl (2000), reggae singer and Marley mentor Joe Higgs (1999), master luthier Antonio Stradivari (1737)

December 19: Roebuck "Pop" Staples (2000), jazz bassist and photographer Milt Hinton (2000), 10,000 Maniacs guitarist Robert Buck (2000), Sony founder Masaru Ibuka (1997), Muddy Waters sideman Jimmy Rogers (1997), The Byrds' Michael Clarke (1993)

December 20: Spanish singer Carlos Cano (2000), Hank Snow (1999), Bobby Darin (1973)

December 21: trumpeter Johnny Coles (1997), Albert King (1992)

1944, a plane carrying bandleader Glenn Miller vanishes over the English Channel ... the fate of the aircraft and its passengers remains a mystery...

1955, Carl Perkins writes "Blue Suede Shoes" and records the song less than 48 hours later ... Elvis covers the tune later that year...

1957, Elvis gets his draft notice...

1960, German authorities deport 17-year-old George Harrison as he's too young to perform with the Beatles in the raucous Hamburg nightclubs that hosted the band in its early days ... Elvis Presley is inducted into the Los Angeles Indian Tribal Council ... the ceremony coincides with the opening of his movie Flaming Star in which the rocker plays a half-breed...

1961, EMI passes on the Beatles ... the British label has second thoughts later on and signs the lads from Liverpool...

1967, The Beach Boys are given transcendental meditation instruction by the guru to the Beatles, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi...

1969, The Supremes log their final appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show ... the trio sings "Someday We'll Be Together" as their TV swan song...

1977, The Sex Pistols are denied U.S. visas two days before the band is to appear on Saturday Night Live...

1988, James Brown draws a prison sentence of six years for fleeing cops during an interstate car chase ... he is paroled in February 1991...

1996, crooner Tony Bennett has just arrived at the White House for a holiday dinner with the Clintons when he suffers an erupted hernia and is rushed to a hospital where he undergoes emergency surgery...

1997, activists including Gloria Steinem and Eleanor Smeal protest in front of the Time Warner building in New York ... they are objecting to the Prodigy song, "Smack My Bitch Up"...

1998, a court finds that songwriter Andrew Lloyd Webber did not plagiarize a liturgical writer's song in composing the theme for his smash musical The Phantom of the Opera...

1998, two of Charlie Daniels' backup players demonstrate extraordinary work ethics when they schedule surgeries to coincide with their boss's appointment for knee surgery ... all three go under the knife on the same day in the same hospital in order to minimize show cancellations ... bassist Jerry Charlie Hayward has a tonsillectomy while drummer Jack Gavin has shoulder surgery...

1999, in announcing that he'll run for mayor of London, former Sex Pistols manager Malcolm McLaren enumerates the novel planks of his political platform: legalize boozing in public libraries, legalize pot, legalize all-night pubs, and last but not least, install brothels outside the houses of Parliament ... he drops out of the race a couple of months later...

1999, former singing cowboy Rex Allen is killed when his caregiver accidentally runs him over in the driveway of his Tucson home...

1999, Goo Goo Dolls nearly bite the big one when the military transport they're flying in skids off a runway in Sicily damaging its landing gear and wing, obliging the Goo Goos to beat a hasty retreat via an emergency chute...

2000, the British music journal Melody Maker prints its final issue after continuous publication since 1926...

2003, Michael Jackson is charged with seven counts of child molestation and two counts of supplying a child with "an intoxicating agent" ... his lawyer denounces the charges claiming they were motivated by money and revenge...

and that was the week that was.

Some Wild and Crazy Things

Ugg Boot

"Up With Blondes"

A blonde decides to do something wild she hasn't
done before, so she sets out to rent her first XXX-rated
adult video. She goes to the video store and, after
looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds
very stimulating. She drives home, lights some candles,
slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape in
the VCR. To her disappointment, there's nothing but
static on the screen, so she calls the video store to
complain.

Blonde: "I just rented an adult movie from you and
there's nothing on the tape, but static."

Store Clerk: "Sorry about, that. We've had problems
with some of those tapes. Which title did you rent?"

Blonde: "It's called 'Head Cleaner."

YOU KNOW YOU GREW UP IN THE 80's IF.....





     1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE ".





     2. You watched the Pound Puppies.





     3. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Bel Air "





     4. Girls wore biker shorts under their skirts and felt stylishly

sexy

     .





     5. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried

to

     start a club of your own.





     6. You owned those lil' Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls.





     7. You know that "WHOA" comes from Joey on Blossom





     8. Two words: Hammer Pants





     9. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock ".





     10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars...playing cards

on

     your spokes for that incredible sound effect.





     11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales" (Woo ooh!)





     12. When it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to

     watch

     cartoons.





     13. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.





     14. You saw the original "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" on the

big

     screen...

     and still know the turtles names.





     15. You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in

computer

     class

     at school.





     16. You made your mom buy one of those clips that would hold your

     shirt

     in a knot on the side.





     17. You played the game "MASH " (Mansion, Apartment, Shelter,

House)





     18. You wore stonewashed Jordache jean jackets and were proud of

it.





     19. L.A. Gear....need I say more





     20. You wanted to change your name to "JEM " in Kindergarten.

(She's

     truly

     outrageous.)





     21. You know the profound meaning of "WAX ON, WAX OFF "





     22. You wanted to be a Goonie.





     23. You ever wore fluorescent clothing. (some of

us...head-to-toe)





     24. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his

nose



     fell off and his cheeks shifted.





     25. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female

smurf.





     26. You took lunch boxes to school... and traded Garbage Pail

Kids

in



     the schoolyard.





     27. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets.





     28. You remember Hypercolor t-shirts.





     29. You thought She-Ra and He-Man should hook up





     30. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because

you

     exchanged handmade friendship bracelets.





     31. You ever owned a pair of Jellies.





     32. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know

you



     are, but what am I? "





     33. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up "





     34. You remember going to the skating rink before there were

in-line

     skates.

     (or when the rink was carpeted)





     35. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide.





     36. You have ever played with a Skip-It.





     37. You remember Popples..





     38. "Don't worry, be happy "





     39. You wore like, EIGHT pairs of scrunchie socks over tights

with

     high

     top Reeboks.





     40. "Miss MARY MACK MACK MACK, all dressed in BLACK BLACK BLACK"





     41. Boom boxes..





     42. You remember watching "Gremlins "





     43. You know what it meant to say "Care Bear Stare!!""





     44. You remember watching "Rainbow Bright" and "My Little Pony

Tales





     45. You thought Doogie Howser/Samantha Micelli was hot.





     46. You remember Alf





     47. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool... and

     don't

     even flinch when people refer to them as "NKOTB".





     48. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on

Saved

     By

     the Bell ", the ORIGINAL class.





     49. You know all the words to Bon Jovi - SHOT THROUGH THE HEART.





     50. You just sang those words to yourself.





     51. You remember watching Magic vs. Bird.





     52. Homemade Levi shorts.. (the shorter the better)





     53. You remember when mullets were cool! (or even had one

yourself)





     54. You still sing "We are the World"





     55. You tight rolled your jeans.





     56. You owned a banana clip





     57. You remember "Where's the Beef?





     58. You used to (and probably still do) say "What you talkin'

about

     Willis?"





     59. You had big hair and you knew how to use it.





     60. You're still singing shot through the heart in your head,

aren't

     you!!!

Now you know everything!!!!

- The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood plasma.

- No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times.

- You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

- Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty (50) years of age or older.

- The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.

- The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.

- American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one (1) olive from each salad served in first-class.

- Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

- Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning

Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.

- The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer. So did the first "MarlboroMan."

- Walt Disney was afraid of mice.

- Pearls melt in vinegar.

- The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

- It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...but not downstairs.

- A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.

- Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least six (6) feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush. (I keep my toothbrush in the living room now!)

And the best for last.....

- Turtles can breathe through their butts. (I know some people like that; don't YOU?)

Now you know everything there is to know

But Baby It's Cold Outside....

Ugg Boot

Single or lonely Japanese men may get lucky this Christmas. One popular item for holiday shoppers is the "lap pillow," with skin-colored polyurethene calves folded under soft thighs -- a comfy cushion for napping, reading or watching television. For an extra 500 yen, you can get the model with two pleasure holes.

A New Zealand woman with Christmas lights on her house that play carols has been asked for an old favorite -- silent night. A noise-control officer told Robin Adams the carols coming from her decorations were too loud and asked her to turn off the lights.

Nursing home staff paid tribute to a 105-year old British woman who had smoked since the age of 15 by cremating her with a packet of cigarettes and laying a large floral cigarette on her coffin. Smoking is bad for you. It might take 90 years to kill but it does kill.

A businessman told a jury on Tuesday how he met a woman in a London nightclub who drugged him with the date-rate drug Rohypnol and stole his Rolex watch as he lay passed out at home. She should be punished to the full extend of the law. I mean, misusing medication is serious. Everything would have been fine if she would have just raped the dude. sheeeeesh!

An Italian town is setting donkeys to work mowing the grass on the side of its highways in an effort to save money and reduce pollution. The United States spent 3 million dollars to get a pen that would write in the 0 gravity of space. The Russians spent $0 to get a writing utinsel that would work in 0 gravity. They used a pencil. Who's the smart one now?

Osama bin Laden take note: You wouldn't be safe in Costa Rica. A startled taxi driver shot and wounded a jokester wearing a plastic mask of the al-Qaida leader. Blahahahahahahahahahah!

The story of Paco the Python is a serpentine tale of a pet snake accidentally shipped from Missouri to New Jersey in a box with a DVD player being sent for repairs. That would have been the end of the line for me.

And now, dumb criminals:
Another reason not to drink on the job. A suspect in at least two dozen Columbus-area armed robberies was arrested after police linked him to a can of beer. A witness to one home invasion told investigators that the robber was seen carrying an Icehouse beer in a paper bag. Based on that information, investigators looked at surveillance videotapes from nearby convenience stores and saw 25-year-old Mario Demarcus Brundidge buying the beer just 30 minutes before Nov. 9 robbery. Idiot. Hahahahahaha.

A man picked the wrong location for an alleged drug deal. Telling an eyewitness to mind his own business was also not a good idea. It was in front of the home of Lewis County's sheriff-elect, who was sitting on his front porch.

Actress Sharon Stone wants you to know her face is real. So she has sued a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon for defamation and libel for falsely claiming that he gave her a facelift.

A Lake County mom was arrested after a camera on a school bus caught her beating a student who had gotten into a fight with her daughter on a school bus, police said. Go to jail bitch.


Today in History:
687 - St. Sergius I becomes Pope

1702 - Forty-seven ronin, formerly in the service of Asano Naganori, assault the household of Kira Yoshinaka, and kill him in vengeance for their lord. Their display of the ideals of bushido becomes a national legend.

1791 - The United States Bill of Rights is passed.

1891 - James Naismith invents basketball

1914 - Battle of Lodz ends; Russians retreat toward Moscow

1939 - Gone With the Wind premiers in Atlanta, Georgia

1961 - An Israeli war crimes tribunal sentences Adolph Eichmann to die for his part in the Jewish holocaust.

1965 - Gemini program: Launch of Gemini 6A

1967 - the Silver Bridge across the Ohio River collapsed during rush hour. Dozens of cars fell into the icy water. Forty-six people lost their lives in the accident, and many others were injured.

1994 - Netscape Navigator 1.0 first released, and Palau is member of the UN.

1997 - A chartered Tupolev TU-154 from Tajikistan crashes in the desert near Sharja, United Arab Emirates airport killing 85

1988 - James Brown begins his prison sentence.

2002 - BBC 7, television channel launched in UK

Birthdays:
37 - Nero, Roman emperor (d. 68)

130 - Lucius Verus, Roman emperor (d. 169)

1832 - Gustave Eiffel, civil engineer (d. 1923)

1910 - John Hammond, musician (d. 1987)

1922 - Alan Freed, disc jockey (d. 1965)

1923 - Freeman Dyson, physicist

1933 - Tim Conway, actor, comedian

1939 - Cindy Birdsong, singer, member of the Supremes

1942 - Dave Clark , musician ("Dave Clark Five")

1949 - Don Johnson, actor (Miami Vice)

Deaths:
1816 - Charles Stanhope , engineer, inventor of the calculator

1890 - Sitting Bull, Sioux nation leader (b. c.1831)

1944 - Glenn Miller, bandleader (presumed date) (b. (1904 )

1966 - Walt Disney, animator, cartoonist (b. 1901)

Why do I have to share my air with you?

Ugg Boot

Hundreds of virgins gathered in the Ugandan capital Friday to meet the country's first lady and renew their pledges to abstain from premarital sex. And they should all be gathered up and shot.

An Israeli man who refused to provide child support to his ex-wife for nearly eight years finally had to start paying up when he remarried and police raided the reception to seize wedding gifts.

Don't dance on tables at the office Christmas party and resist the temptation to photocopy body parts in a drunken attempt to amuse colleagues. C'mon!!! Live a little.

A top municipal official in Phoenix died in a bizarre incident that saw him crawl out of his fast-moving vehicle, stand atop its roof and extend his arms outward before tumbling off.

A jailed cocaine dealer is working as Santa Claus on day release from a British prison.

A medieval limestone slab which for years was used as a gravestone for a dead cat called Winkle fetched more than 200,000 pounds ($383,200) at auction on Friday.

A Norwegian court has acquitted a man accused of raping a sleeping woman after he said he was also asleep at the time. This is completely possible. Trust me. I know.

Try restaurant rage. A 34-year-old man apparently angry that his $6 steak and cheese sandwich was too cold was arrested on a charge of threatening to kill the restaurant manager Wednesday.

A small plane that had lost power briefly landed atop an 18-wheeler before crashing onto the highway, authorities said. The two people aboard the plane came out unscathed, and the truck driver never heard a thing.

Assault with a pork chop???

Today in da history of da world:
1817 - Mississippi becomes the 20th U.S. state.

1864 - William Tecumseh Sherman reaches Savannah, Georgia, ending his "March to the Sea". Finally his kids will stop asking "are we there yet?"

1869 - Wyoming grants women the right to vote. Mistake #1.

1901 - First Nobel Prizes awarded.

1936 - Edward VIII, the only British monarch to have voluntarily relinquished the throne, chis instrument of abdication. He reverted to the title of "His Royal Highness Prince Edward of York" the following day.

1938 Filming of Gone with The Wind begins.

1963 - Frank Sinatra Jr. Kidnapped.

1965 - The Grateful Dead play their first concert, at the Fillmore in San Francisco.

1993 - Shareware version of DOOM is released

Happy Birthday:
1830 - Emily Dickinson, poet (d. 1886)

1957 - Michael Clarke Duncan, actor

Deaths:
1896 - Alfred Nobel, chemist, founder of the Nobel Prize (b. 1833)

1967 - Otis Redding, singer (b. 1941)

1996 - Faron Young , country music singer

Sad Day For Heavy Metal

Ugg Boot


"Dimebag" Darrell Abbott, formerly of Pantera, KILLED WHILE ON STAGE!!!

COLUMBUS, Ohio - A gunman , Nathan Gale(unsure of last name) 28, charged onstage at a packed nightclub and opened fire on the band and crowd, killing top heavy metal guitarist "Dimebag" Darrell Abbott and three other people before a police officer shot him to death, authorities and witnesses said.

Police spokeswoman Sherry Mercurio identified three of the victims of Wednesday's shooting as Abbott, who played for the Texas-based band Damageplan, and two other men, Nathan Bray, 23; and Erin Halk, 29.

She identified the gunman as Nathan Gale, 25, of Marysville, 25 miles northwest of Columbus. Police said they had no information on a motive or any connection to the band.

The gunman had a hostage in a headlock and seemed to be preparing to kill him when the officer, James D. Niggemeyer, managed to shoot without injuring the hostage, police said.

Damageplan had just begun its first song at Alrosa Villa club when the man shot Abbott five or six times at point-blank range, a witness said.

Abbott, 38, one of metal's top guitarists, and his brother, Damageplan drummer Vinnie Paul Abbott, were members of Pantera, the Grammy-nominated thrash-rock pioneer that enjoyed wide popularity in the 1990s.

The witness, 22-year-old Chris Couch, said he was standing about 30 feet from the stage when he saw a man wearing a hooded sweat shirt walk up to the stage, followed by a bouncer and another club employee.

The man in the sweat shirt climbed onto the stage, started yelling and opened fire on the guitarist, then shot a bouncer who pulled him off the musician, Couch said.

Police spokesman Sgt. Brent Mull said that after shooting at band members, the gunman fired into the crowd. Niggemeyer, patrolling nearby, arrived within two minutes, he said.

"If the officer wasn't as close as he was, I think this would have been a lot worse," Mull said. "It was a chaotic scene, just a horrific scene."

Niggemeyer, 31, entered the club through a back door and was directed to the stage, where he saw one person lying dead and the suspect holding onto another "pretty much in a headlock," Mull said.

"The officer was able to strategically gun this guy down before he was able to kill this hostage," Mull said. He said the hostage, "probably a fan, maybe someone who worked with the band," was able to maneuver out of the way somewhat before the officer fired.

Mull said he believed there was amateur video that officers could view for clues.

The name of the fifth person killed was not immediately released. Mercurio said family members were still being notified.

Thursday morning, a dozen yellow roses, still in plastic wrap, lay near the entry to the low-slung beige building that since 1974 has hosted mostly heavy metal acts. The 641-person-capacity club, just off a freeway exit on the city's north side, sits amid motels, small businesses and office complexes.

After the shooting began, Couch and a friend headed for the exit along with a tide of hundreds of fans.

"It was definitely a grudge. It was against something," Couch said.

Amanda Stankus, 19, who attended the show with Couch, said she initially thought the shooting was part of the show. "I just saw the guitarist fall down, and we decided to get out of there," she said.

The Abbott brothers produced Damageplan's debut album, "New Found Power," which was released in February. Other band members are vocalist Patrick Lachman and bassist Bob Zilla.

"Damageplan carries on the tradition Pantera started, the ... hell-raising tradition we were all about," Vinnie Paul Abbott told The Dallas Morning News in October. "We do play some Pantera songs. Me and Dime wrote them, and we feel like we have the right to play them. But the focus is on Damageplan.

"It took awhile for some of the Pantera fans to accept it; we knew that was gonna be the case," he said. "Change is something that people have a hard time accepting. But me and Dime intended on doing this our whole lives."

A message left with Atlantic Records Group, which oversees Damageplan's label Elektra, was not immediately returned.

Damageplan's Web site said Darrel and Vinnie Abbott grew up in the Dallas-Fort Worth area, where their father, country songwriter Jerry Abbott, owned a recording studio.

Telephone numbers for Darrell and Jerry Abbott are unlisted and could not be reached early Thursday by The Associated Press.

Pantera, known for its fast, aggressive sound, recorded several albums in the 1990s, attracting a massive cult following. The third release, "Far Beyond Driven," debuted at No. 1 in 1994, surprising chart-watchers and critics alike. Other hit albums were "The Great Southern Trendkill" and "Reinventing The Steel." A song by the band became the Dallas Stars hockey team's signature tune in 1999.

Pantera was nominated for Grammies for best metal performance in 1995 for "I'm Broken" and in 2001 for "Revolution Is My Name."

The video "The Best of Pantera: Far Beyond the Great Southern Cowboys' Vulgar Hits" hit the top 10 for music-video sales earlier this year; another video, "3-Watch It Go," hit the top 10 in 1998.

The shootings came exactly 24 years after John Lennon was shot to death outside his New York apartment building by a deranged fan.

Dozens of messages were posted to the Dallas band's Web site after the shootings.

"This is the worst day in metal history," one posting read.

"The metal world feels your pain," another wrote..

Today... Dick, Sex, Pussy, and Christmas

Ugg Boot

Dick Clark in the hospital following stroke.

Do You Prefer More Money or More Sex? Germans prefer money to sex, a new survey for Playboy magazine shows. That's because they're doing it wrong. Let's analyze that. If you have money, you have sex. If you have no money, you can still have sex but not with supermodels. You can sell sex. So really, money and sex go hand in hand. You have to spend money, regardless, to have sex.

A Christmas campaign for an "immaculate contraception" morning-after birth control pill has been scrapped by a drug company in Britain after causing offence on religious grounds. hahahaha

Two hundred years after he crowned himself emperor of France, a handwritten draft of Napoleon Bonaparte's memoirs -- littered with spelling mistakes -- fetched a record price at auction in Paris. He was emperor, meaning, spelling should be changed to suit him.

A German couple were shocked after a 440 km (275 mile) car journey to discover a surprise stowaway cowering next to the engine of their car -- a 6-week-old kitten. It was a hot worn out pussy.

Residents of this central Pennsylvania community are marking the holidays with a 4-foot potted evergreen tree instead of the 20-foot tree that has been used for the past eight years, because of a feud between the borough council and a local business. Drama, drama, drama. That's all people want these days. Is this a soap opera or what? Can't we just all get along?

What does Dude mean? Linguist Deciphers Uses of Word 'Dude'. That dude has too much time on his hands.

Students occasionally parading naked around Vermont's Bennington College campus has been a tolerated, if peculiar, part of the university's student culture here since the 1960s. Now Robert Graves, hired this year as Bennington's dean of students, has embarked on a crusade against public nudity -- one that has run afoul of the school's free-spirited students. C'mon dick, live a little. It's all these tight asses that make life such a bitch.

When Vietnamese troops overran his village in 1979, Romam Chhung Loeung, a Khmer Rouge guerrilla, had no option but to flee with friends and family into the dense jungle of northeast Cambodia. Twenty-five years later, the group emerged from the forest in clothes made of bark and leaves, unaware that the war was over, the Vietnamese had gone and Pol Pot was dead. They threw a party and watched the movie Blast from the Past.

Six months after his death, Ray Charles is having a career year. He's the subject of the critically acclaimed biopic "Ray," his posthumous album, "Genius Loves Company," has become a best seller, and on Tuesday, it received seven Grammy nominations — more than any other album by the musical icon. We love and miss you Ray.

Almost one in four people with broadband internet admit signing up in order to download pornography, according to a survey published today. Who does this surprise???

Someday your nose could get a workout while your fingers click the mouse. Japan's top telecommunications company NTT is adding smell to the sights and sounds of the Internet. That'll take porn to a whole new level.

Today in History:
1854 - Pope Pius IX proclaims the dogma of Immaculate Conception, which holds that the Virgin Mary was born free of original sin.

1941 - World War II: After the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor the previous day, the United States Congress passes a declaration of war against Japan, bringing the United States of America officially into World War 2; Congresswoman Jeannette Rankin casts the only "no" vote. In response, Hitler's Germany declares war on the United States.

1941 - Holocaust: First Nazi use of gas vans on Jews, at the Chelmno camp near Lodz.

1964 - Great Britain's worst auto accident ever killed three people and injured 120 in a pileup of more than 100 vehicles near Wigan, England.

1976 - The Eagles release one of the biggest-selling albums of all time, Hotel California

1980 - Mark David Chapman kills former Beatle John Lennon.

Birthdays:
65 BC - Horace, poet (d. 8 BC)

1542 - Mary Queen of Scots (d. 1587)

1626 - Queen Christina of Sweden (d. 1689)

1765 - Eli Whitney, inventor (d. 1825)

1925 - Sammy Davis Jr., actor, singer (d. 1990)

1943 - Jim Morrison, singer (The Doors) (d. 1971)

1947 - Gregg Allman, musician

1953 - Kim Basinger, actress

1957 - Phil Collen . Def Leppard guitarist

1966 - Sinead O'Connor, musician


Deaths:
1980 - John Lennon, musician

1982 - Marty Robbins, country music singer