In The Flesh

Ugg Boot

Words of Wisdom

Never name a pig you plan to eat.

Country fences ought to be horse high, pig tight, and bull strong.

Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb. It's about how good you bounce.

Keep skunks and gossipers at a distance.

Life is simpler when you plow around the stumps.
Trouble with a milk cow is...she won't stay milked.

Don't skinny dip with snapping turtles.

Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

To know how country folks are doing, look at their barns, not their houses.

Teachers, Moms, and hoot owls sleep with one eye open.

Forgive your enemies. It messes with their heads.

Don't sell your mule to buy a plow.

Two can live as cheap as one...if one don't eat.

Don't corner something meaner than you.

You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar...if you're in to catching flies.

It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

Don't go drinking with a fellow named Chug-A-Lug.

You can't unsay a cruel remark.

Every path has some puddles.

The best sermons are lived, not preached.

Most of the stuff people worry about never happens.

The early bird gets the worm. But...the second mouse gets the cheese!.


And Now......
Britain's Ascension Island has been without mail since October because the Royal Mail has been sending its mail to South America. It took them 3 months to figure that out? They should try delivery confirmation.

A Presbyterian minister collapsed and died in mid-sentence of a sermon after saying "And when I go to heaven ...," his colleague said Monday. I guess that gave God and idea. Amen brother!



Ben Lipscomb found himself lost in the flooded backwoods of Bayou Meto this week while duck hunting with his Labrador retriever, Josey Wales. He only managed to make it out by tying his white briefs to the end of his gun barrel and waving them at an Arkansas State Police helicopter. hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Michelin has unveiled an integrated tyre and wheel that runs without air -- a concept that the world's biggest tyre maker said could one day boost car performance and make pneumatic tyres obsolete. What?


Looks like the days of "Girls, Girls, Girls" are over for Motley Crue frontman Vince Neil. Neil, 43, the band's lead singer, married girlfriend Lia Gerardini, 37, Sunday at the Four Seasons hotel.

A woman claiming to be the KISS demon's ex-girlfriend before he became famous is suing Simmons, alleging he slandered her as a "sex-addicted nymphomaniac" in a VH1 program about the band. Gene Simmons has said many times that he had sex with any female present. You Rock Gene!!! and ex-girlfriend....go smoke some more crack!!!

Rain lashed water-logged Southern California again Tuesday, hampering efforts to find survivors buried by a mud slide in a coastal community and prompting hundreds to flee a mountain town before a rain-swollen lake spills over a dam. Sad, very sad.

A lawyer for Charles Graner, accused ringleader in the Iraq prisoner abuse scandal, on Monday compared piling naked prisoners into pyramids to cheerleader shows and said leashing inmates was also acceptable prisoner control. I always liked cheerleaders. Explain to me what was wrong with the nude pyramid? Atleast we're not torturing them with pain. but oh the stress. It's so degrading. War is degrading.

...And of course on the Living Crazy page, we always appreciate a good recipe.

CAT LITTER CAKE RECIPE

The pictures below show the results, which looks like S#%* but I hear is actually quite tasty.

CAKE INGREDIENTS

1 box spice or German chocolate cake mix
1 box of white cake mix
1 package white sandwich cookies
1 large package vanilla instant pudding mix

A few drops green food coloring
12 small Tootsie Rolls or equivalent

SERVING "DISHES AND UTENSILS"

1 NEW cat-litter box
1 NEW cat-litter box liner
1 NEW pooper scooper

Prepare and bake cake mixes, according to directions, in any size pan. Prepare pudding and chill. Crumble cookies in small batches in blender or food processor. Add a few drops of green food coloring to 1 cup of cookie crumbs. Mix with a fork or shake in a jar. Set aside.

When cakes are at room temperature, crumble them into a large bowl. Toss with half of the remaining cookie crumbs and enough pudding to make the mixture moist but not soggy. Place liner in litter box and pour in mixture.

Unwrap 3 Tootsie Rolls and heat in a microwave until soft and pliable. Shape the blunt ends into slightly curved points. Repeat with three more rolls. Bury the rolls decoratively in the cake mixture. Sprinkle remaining white cookie crumbs over the mixture, then scatter green crumbs lightly over top.

Heat 5 more Tootsie Rolls until almost melted. Scrape them on top of the cake and sprinkle with crumbs from the litter box. Heat the remaining Tootsie Roll until pliable and hang it over the edge of the box. Place box on a sheet of newspaper and serve with scooper. Enjoy!

You about ready for today's history lesson?

• 532 - Nika riots in Constantinople.
• 1158 - Vladislav II becomes King of Bohemia.
• 1569 - First recorded lottery in England.
• 1571 - Austrian nobility is granted Freedom of religion.
• 1693 - Eruption of Mt. Etna.
• 1759 - In Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, the first American life insurance company is incorporated.
• 1787 - William Herschel discovers Titania and Oberon, two moons of Uranus.
• 1805 - Michigan Territory is created.
• 1861 - Alabama secedes from the United States.
• 1863 - American Civil War: Battle of Arkansas Post - General John McClernand and Admiral David Porter capture the Arkansas River for the Union.
• 1867 - Benito Juárez becomes Mexican president again.
• 1879 - Anglo-Zulu War begins.
• 1908 - Grand Canyon National Monument is created.
• 1919 - Romania annexes Transylvania.
• 1922 - First successful treatment with insulin against diabetes.
• 1923 - Troops from France and Belgium occupy the Ruhr area to force Germany to pay its reparation payments.
• 1935 - Amelia Earhart is the first woman to fly solo from Hawaii to California.
• 1938 - Frances Moulton is the first woman to become president of a US national bank.
• 1942 - Japan declares war on the Netherlands and invades the Netherlands East Indies.
• 1942 - The Japanese capture Kuala Lumpur.
• 1943 - The United States and United Kingdom give up territorial rights in China.
• 1946 - Enver Hoxha declares the people's republic of Albania with himself as dictator.
• 1949 - First recorded case of snowfall in Los Angeles, California.
• 1962 - Eruption of the volcano Huascaran in Peru; 4000 deaths.
• 1963 - The Whisky A Go-Go night club in Los Angeles, the first disco in the USA, is opened.
• 1964 - United States Surgeon General Luther Terry reports that smoking may be hazardous for one's health. First such statement from US government.
• 1972 - East Pakistan becomes Bangladesh.
• 1973 - Beginning of the Watergate burglars trial.
• 1980 - Nigel Short, 14 years old, is the youngest chess player to be awarded the degree of International Master.
• 1990 - Massive (300,000) demonstration in favor of Lithuanian independence.
• 1992 - Paul Simon is the first major artist to tour South Africa after the end of the cultural boycott .
• 1996 - Haiti becomes a member of the Berne Convention copyright treaty.

Birthdays:

• 1757 - Alexander Hamilton, first United States Secretary of the Treasury (d. 1804)
• 1757 - Samuel Bentham, mechanical engineer (d. 1831)
• 1800 - Nat Turner, American slave
• 1807 - Ezra Cornell, founder of Cornell University (d. 1874)
• 1815 - John A. Macdonald, first Prime Minister of Canada (d. 1891)
• 1856 - Christian Sinding, composer (d. 1941)
• 1858 - Harry Gordon Selfridge, founder of Selfridges (d. 1947)
• 1859 - George Nathaniel Curzon (Lord Curzon), British statesman (d. 1925)
• 1860 - Marie Bashkirtseff, artist (d. 1884)
• 1876 - Elmer Flick, baseball player (d. 1971)
• 1885 - Alice Paul, women's rights activist
• 1899 - Eva LeGallienne , actress (d. 1991)
• 1903 - Alan Paton, writer (d. 1988)
• 1906 - Albert Hofmann, chemist, discoverer of LSD effects
• 1923 - Jacqueline Maillan , French actress
• 1924 - Slim Harpo, musician (d. 1970)
• 1925 - Grant Tinker , television executive
• 1925 - William Styron, writer
• 1926 - Lev Demin, cosmonaut (d. 1998)
• 1928 - David L. Wolper , producer
• 1930 - Rod Taylor, Australian actor
• 1934 - Jean Chrétien, twentieth Prime Minister of Canada
• 1938 - Arthur Scargill British trade union leader.
• 1942 - Clarence Clemens , musician (E Street Band)
• 1943 - Jim Hightower, radio host, author
• 1944 - Shibu Soren, politician
• 1946 - Naomi Judd , country music singer
• 1947 - Bryan Robson, football player
• 1952 - Lee Ritenour , musician, composer
• 1952 - Ben Crenshaw , golfer
• 1960 - Stanley Tucci, actor
• 1963 - Dean Reynolds, English snooker player
• 1971 - Mary J. Blige, pop singer
• 1973 - Rahul Dravid, cricketer, India
• 1977 - Shomari Buchanan, wide receiver of the Corpus Christi Hammerheads from the IFL

Deaths:

• 314 - St. Miltiades, Pope
• 705 - John VI, Pope
• 1055 - Constantine IX Monomachos, emperor of the Byzantine Empire, (b. c. 1000)
• 1843 - Francis Scott Key, American lawyer who composed The Star-Spangled Banner
• 1857 - Eli Smith, Christian missionary and Bible translator (b. 1801)
• 1901 - Vasily Kalinnikov, composer
• 1928 - Thomas Hardy, writer (b. 1840)
• 1958 - Edna Purviance, actress (b. 1895)
• 1966 - Alberto Giacometti, Italian sculptor (b. 1901)
• 1966 - Hannes Kolehmainen, Finnish long-distance runner
• 1970 - Richmal Crompton, author (b. 1890)
• 1980 - Barbara Pym, novelist ([[b. 1913)
• 1983 - Shri Ghanshyam Das Birla, Indian industrialist, Gandhian and educationist, (b. 1894)
• 1988 - Pappy Boyington, aviator
• 2001 - Sir Denys Lasdun, architect (b. 1914)
• 2003 - Mickey Finn Drummer in T. Rex (band) You remember T. Rex... Bang a Gong.