Defender of the Fatherland Day

Ugg Boot

Crazy B animated?






February 23: Defender of the Fatherland Day in Russia . I bet you didn't know that. How do we celebrate? Get someone to say something about your father and then knock his lights out.

I was wondering where I would take my dinner at today and came across this story. I think I'll eat at Subway today. Rats run wild in KFC-Taco Bell in N.Y.

1st Beaver spotted in NYC in 200 years. They obviously weren't going to the same clubs as I. hehehe. "Nice Beaver." "Thanks. I just had it stuffed."

Chimpanzee seen 'hunting' with weapon. Darwin told us, didn't he?

A group of U.S. tourists, including a former Marine, killed a Costa Rican mugger by breaking his neck after he pulled a gun on them in a Caribbean port. Take that biotch.

After sentencing Kite on Wednesday to prison for stealing a lawnmower from a home, St. Clair County Circuit Judge John Baricevic obliged the 23-year-old man's request and married him to girlfriend Victoria Smith in the same courtroom. This should be a "My Name Is Earl" episode.
"Hey Earl" "Hey Crabman"

Two clowns were shot and killed by an unidentified gunman during their performance at a traveling circus in the eastern Colombian town of Cucuta. The detective entered the tent and said "get those clowns outta here!!!" If you don't get that joke.........

A routine appendix operation in Belgrade went badly wrong when two surgeons started fighting and stormed from the operating theater to settle their dispute outside. That must've been funny. I hear that by the time the fight was over, the patient was in stitches.

Fake bull testicles and other anatomically explicit vehicle decorations would be banned from Maryland roads under a bill pending in the state legislature. It's a good thing I live close to Texas. They're not stoopid enouf to do anything like thaat. My Pt Cruiser has a set of bull balls too. It's so masculine. My cruiser has bite now. hehehe

Let's take a break from all of this news crap. Have you ever wondered what was happening in London right now? Take a look at Londons webcams here. Have I mentioned that I want to go on vacation there? This may be the year.

Back to the news.
A newly opened store catering to very pampered dogs, especially female dogs, is getting more than questioning looks for its name, High Maintenance Bitch. Hahahaha. I think I knew her.

A man sleeping in a trash receptacle was injured Thursday after being dumped into a trash truck and then compacted. Who would sleep there? Don't knock it until you try it. That's all I have to say about it.

Tired of your heating bill being so high? Be very thankful. Perhaps his $24 billion electric bill will teach Richard Redden not to leave the heat running. Thanks to a printing error, Redden and more than 1,300 Weatherford utility customers this week received billion-dollar electric bills marked as late notices.

Just curious. Do you know who Richard Starkey is?

Documentary makers claim tomb of Jesus found in Jerusalem. "Don't you judge me."
It makes you wonder. If this were true, what would the world come to? That's scary. How would someone prove this? I guess the same way the Bible was proven. Remember religion is based on faith and not historical fact as we know it.

Court Backs NYC's Ban on Dancing in Bars. That is such a waste of time. Who comes up with this crap? How much did that ban cost? Dumbasses.

South Bay Lawmaker Abandons Outlawing Spanking. That's why we have such a violent youth in this country. In school, you can't discipline kids. They try to make it where you can't discipline at home? They try to blame it on video games and tv. C'mon, we're smarter than that. It all goes back to bad parenting. If you disagree, please leave a comment for the rest of us to laugh at.


Today in History:
0303 Emperor Diocletian orders general persecution of Christians

1455 - Traditional date for the publication of the Gutenberg Bible, the first Western book printed from movable type. We'll have no scribblers here. 1455 Johannes Gutenberg prints 1st book, the Bible (estimated date)

1668 Fire in Wiener Hofburg in Vienna, emperor Leopold I rescued

1689 Dutch prince William III proclaimed king of England

1778 - American Revolution: Baron von Steuben arrives at Valley Forge, Pennsylvania to help to train the Continental Army. I wonder how the British see that war.

1813 1st US raw cotton-to-cloth mill founded in Waltham MA

1820 - Cato Street Conspiracy: A plot to murder all the British cabinet ministers is exposed. Wait a minute. The British have cabinet ministers? How do you preach to a cabinet? "Here we stand in the kitchen where many have stood before....."

1836 - The Siege of the Alamo begins in San Antonio, Texas. Doh!!!

1861 - President-elect Abraham Lincoln arrives secretly in Washington, D.C., after an assassination attempt in Baltimore, Maryland. They should've left that man alone.

1870 - Military control of Mississippi ends and it is readmitted to the Union.

1874 - Major Walter Clopton Wingfield patents a game called "sphairistike," now more commonly called lawn tennis.

1886 Aluminum manufacturing process developed

1886 London Times publishes world's 1st classified ad. Now that's interesting.

1893 - Rudolf Diesel receives a patent for the diesel engine.

1896 Tootsie Roll introduced by Leo Hirshfield. How has this man not been on a postage stamp yet?

1904 - For $10 million the United States gains control of the Panama Canal Zone.

1910 1st radio contest held (Philadelphia)

1915 Nevada enforces convenient divorce law. The words convenient and divorce should never be in the same sentence.

1916 French artillery kills entire French 72nd division at Samogneux Verdun. French killed French? Did they know they were at war with themselves?

1917 - First demonstrations in Saint Petersburg, Russia. The beginning of the February Revolution. They demonstrated how to finish drywall. The next week was an interior painting demonstration. I'd like to have the odds of that. A February Revolution in February.

1921 1st US transcontinental air mail flight arrives in New York NY from San Francisco CA

1927 - The Federal Radio Commission (later renamed the Federal Communications Commission) begins to regulate the use of radio frequencies. Why did they do that? To make money.

1936 1st rocket air mail flight, Greenwood Lake NY

1940 Walt Disney's animated movie "Pinocchio", released

1941 - Plutonium was first produced and isolated by Dr. Glenn T. Seaborg. Did anyone ever ask Plutonium if he liked being all lonely and isolated?

1945 - World War II: During the Battle of Iwo Jima, a group of United States Marines reach the top of Mount Suribachi on the island and are photographed raising the American flag. The photo would later win a Pulitzer Prize. 1945 US Marines raise flag on Iwo Jima, famous photo & statue. So did they raise a flag, a famous photo, and a statue? A quick funny. A southern black man was on trial and the judge started to speak.... "You are charged with statutory rape, how do you plea?" He replies back "Statue???? I ain't rapes no statue!!!"

1945 - World War II: The German town of Pforzheim is completely destroyed by a raid of 379 British bombers. No one could pronounce it anyway.

1954 - The first mass vaccination of children against polio begins in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I think I'd like to try to play polio. It looks fun with the horses and stuff.

1956 - In a cosmic event known as the great flare, the Earth was bombarded with a burst of protons and other nuclei from a solar flare. Millions went on with their daily lives.

1967 US troops begin largest offensive of Vietnam War

1971 George Harrison is fined & his driving license is suspended for 1 year as a result of several speeding tickets and a dispute with the police. He tried to explain that it was all Lovely Rita, Meter Maids fault. "We can work it out", he said. "Life is very short and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend."

1974 - The Symbionese Liberation Army demands $4 million more to release kidnap victim Patty Hearst. Keep your little kidnap victim. She's not worth $4 million. Maybe 2.5 millions. Whatdayasay?

1975 - In response to the energy crisis, daylight saving time commences nearly two months early in the United States. Can they do that? I guess so, they're the government. They can do anything.

1979 George Harrison releases "George Harrison" album

1981 People magazine features drug ordeal of Mackenzie & Papa John Phillips(mamas and papas)

1983 - The Environmental Protection Agency announces its intent to buy out and evacuate the dioxin-contaminated community of Times Beach, Missouri.

1987 - A supernova is seen in the Large Magellanic Cloud (see Supernova 1987a). Was the Supernova made by Chevrolet?

1993 Gary Coleman wins $1,280,000 lawsuit against parents for high fees. Whatchoo talkin bout dad?

1997 - A large fire occurs in the Russian Space station, Mir. Were those crazy Russians lighting farts again?

1997 NBC TV shows "Schindler's List", completely uncensored, 65 million watch. No farts were lit in the making of this show.

1997 Scientists in Scotland announced they succeeded in cloning an adult mammal, producing a lamb named "Dolly".

1998 Howard Stern Radio Show premieres in Charleston SC on WAVF 96.1 FM. Millions of farts are lit simultaneously.

1998 - Osama bin Laden publishes a fatwa declaring jihad against all Jews and Crusaders. Holy jihad Batman.


Happy Birthday:
1583 - Jean-Baptiste Morin, French scientist (d. 1656)
1680 - Jean-Baptiste Le Moyne de Bienville, French colonizer and Governor of Louisiana (d. 1767)
1685 - Georg Friedrich Handel, German/British Baroque composer (d. 1759)
1729 - Josiah Hornblower, American statesman (d. 1809) This guy missed his calling. I see him as a Sax player.
1850 - César Ritz, Swiss hotelier (d. 1918)
1883 - Victor Fleming, American director (d. 1949)
1904 - Leopold Trepper, Soviet spy (d. 1982)
1915 - Paul Tibbets, American pilot
1932 - Majel Barrett, American actress
1940 - Peter Fonda, American actor
1944 - Johnny Winter, American musician
1952 - Brad Whitford, American musician (Aerosmith) Brad plays bass. Hmmmm.
1955 - Tom Bodett, American voice actor, radio personality, and writer. "We'll keep the light on for ya"
1965 - Michael Dell, American computer manufacturer. "Dude, you're getting a piece of crap if you're gettin' a dell."
1983 - Amy Pendergrass, crazy girl I know.




























Deaths on This Day:
1781 - George Taylor, American signer of the Declaration of Independence (bc. 1716)
1848 - John Quincy Adams, 6th President of the United States (b. 1767)
1937 - Victim 7 of the Cleveland Torso Murderer
1946 - Tomoyuki Yamashita, Japanese general (hanged) (b. 1885) So why is it not Hung anymore. I guess that's now reserved for someone that is well endowed???
1965 - Stan Laurel, British born actor and comedian (b. 1890) He barely heard of the Beatles?
1995 - Melvin Franklin, American singer (The Temptations) (b. 1942)
2003 - Howie Epstein, American bass guitarist (Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers) (b. 1955)


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