Walkin' in the rain

Ugg Boot

Racy photos of reality TV star Paris Hilton again spread across the Internet on Tuesday -- this time accompanied by celebrity phone numbers, e-mail addresses and other information hacked from her mobile phone. Does anyone care?

A blind man has been arrested in Scotland after witnesses reported he sank his teeth into his guide dog and kicked her across the road. Cross the street now bitch!!!

Swiss authorities have ruled that a Geneva-based half-brother of al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden has the right to use the family name as a trademark. That's such a great idea.

A drunken Florida prosecutor who streaked across a motel parking lot and mistakenly jumped into a stranger's car landed in jail. Doh!!! I hate it when that happens. That's twice this year already for me.

The delicate problem of how to dump a lover before moving on to the next one has been given a new twist by a Dutch Web site. The site suggests women tell their partner they want a baby and men buy their girlfriend underwear that's too big. Boy does that answer some questions I had. And I thought they just wanted to have my children.

Doctors have partially restored the sight of an 81-year-old Buddhist monk who accidentally glued his eyes shut when he mistook a tube of superglue for eye drops. Oh my gosh. Does that suck.

Check out these classy nudes. Don't be afraid. It's not porn. That comes later.

Back in the 80's, everything looked good for me, Elyse, and Jody(male or female still uncertain). We had a happy future ahead of us.

I had a good job as a mechanic.

I had a good car. But things would soon change.

Everything started going in the wrong direction.


I lost hair in some places but gained it in others.

Then the shit hit the fan.

So I packed up my shit and left.

She ain't gettin' into my Pinto either.

But once, we were so happy.